The Meaning of Stars

Before I get started with the book reviewing, I'd like to address a problem I tend to have at times such as this- numerical rating. If you are anything like me, tying yourself down to a number rating can be hard. One begins to wonder, “What, exactly, is the difference between a 2 and a 3? Or a 7 and an 8? What if I give a 5 star book a 6 star rating? How can I accurately assign the right number to all these books? AHHHHHHHH!” So, in the interest of my own sanity, I'd like to articulate what I feel each number really means in terms of merit. When I review a book, I'll try to be as consistent to this scale as I can, and anyone else who wants to use it can too. If you don't like it or want to do your own thing, go ahead and use whatever works for you.

1 star- There is nothing to redeem this book. Poor characters, a poor plot, a poor topic, and poor descriptions all combine into a single monstrous piece of writing that makes you wonder whether life has any meaning. Reading even small portions of this book makes you want to weep, and then die.

2 stars- Overall, this book was terrible. Embarrassing. Painful. However, there was a little something that saved it from oblivion. Perhaps it was funny scene, or a surprising plot twist. Whatever it was, you were grateful for it, because it provided relief from the tedious trudge that was the rest of this book.

3 stars- Something about this book was done right. Because of that, the book could have been enjoyable. Unfortunately, the wrong outweighed the right overall. Had you been an editor, you'd have sent it back to the author and encouraged them to keep working on it.

4 stars- Nothing about this book is really that bad. Unfortunately, nothing about the book is really that good either. You were a little frustrated sometimes, and other times you were mildly amused. You will likely forget this book soon after reading, for nothing much stood out.

5 stars- This book had potential. It really did. But it fizzled and simmered when it should have blazed. There were good bits that could have been great bits. You don't regret reading the book, but you wouldn't really recommend it either.

6 stars- A good book. Not a great one, but a good one. There might have been a problem or two, but they didn't break the book. It made you smile, or it made you think. You probably won't read it again, but it was worth one read.

7 stars- A fine book indeed. A good idea that was well written. Any problems that it had were small or insignificant. You'd likely recommend this book to anyone who seemed interested.

8 stars- A solid book, with no real weakness. There was even a time or two that it really glowed. You could see yourself reading this book again in a few years. You even find yourself loyal to the author, eager to read other things that they have written.

9 stars- This book made you laugh, cry, and everything in between. It was nearly impossible to put the book down, and every twist and turn kept you begging for more. Upon finishing, you felt a little sad, because a great and enjoyable journey was complete. You'd heartily recommend this book to just about anyone.

10 stars- It was everything a 9 was, plus a little more. You know that you'll read this book again and again, and you'll enjoy it every time. You feel the book represents creativity, ingenuity, and the English language in a way few people or things can. You weep for those who haven't yet read this book.

There you have it. Two more points, for those of you who haven't fallen asleep.

1. Regarding nonfiction, I would like to give a separate rating for “Experts” and “Newcomers” whenever it seems applicable. Sometimes a book can only be good if you know something about the topic, and a newcomer would only be frustrated by. Other times a book can be enjoyed by anyone. I'd like my ratings to reflect that.

2. I would also like to establish a scale of -1, -2, -3, or unreadable for profane or otherwise explicit content. Sometimes an interesting book is frustratingly peppered with offensive language or some other problem. Such things can effect readability, based on the reader's preferences.

Let me just say again that this was help me out. I don't want anyone to feel tied down by this rating system. If you like it, feel free to use it. If you don't like it, don't use it.